The Wounded Healer
Dear church,
A lot has been written about wounded healers in the last century, about the phenomenon that people who had their own painful experiences in life are often well suited to bring healing and comfort to others. There was the Swiss Psychologist Carl Jung who regarded the wounded healer one of the principal archetypes of life. There is the classic book by Dutch writer Henry Nouwen, “The wounded healer,” who proposed that ministry in our times is most effectively done by people who are in touch with their own vulnerabilities, not by saints in robes. There is the entire AA movement, which is founded on the discovery that people with issues, not experts, are best suited to help other people with issues because they “get it.” Countless articles and essays in psychology periodicals make the same point. And looming over all of them, there is the sacred story of the wounded healer, Jesus appearing to his disciples on the evening of the first day of Easter, his hands pierced, his side bloodied, his skin torn, his feet injured, saying to a startled crowd of followers, “Peace be with you. As the father has sent me, so I am sending you!”
We cannot overestimate the healing power of a person’s transformed woundedness, the empathy and understanding that flows from someone who has suffered something akin to what another person is forced to endure. There is even poetic justice in that. At least the pain you endured enables you to contribute in some way, to help. Wounded healers tend to be good listeners, empathetic and resourceful. Some of them are sitting in the pews this morning.
In the narrative of the gospels, Jesus is the obvious wounded healer, but there are others as well. Peter is next in line because he is such a pathetic failure in the hour of Jesus’ death and yet we sense that his own downfall enhumbled him to become the leader of the Easter church. Thomas, the main character of today’s gospel, can be counted in that category; his doubts are on public display. His skepticism is expressed in today’s gospel. Encountering the risen Christ and touching his wounds enhumbled Thomas to think less and serve more. There are some people I know that I want to say to: “Think a little less, serve more!” Tradition has it that Thomas went all the way to India to share the gospel of Jesus Christ.
For all of us this is truly good news. We may say to ourselves that God loves us despite our flaws, mistakes and inconsistencies, but it is so much more than that. First, scratch the word “despite,” once and for all. God deeply loves you, including what you regard as your flaws; those aspects of yourself that you may be ashamed of are in fact entryways for God into your world and they can become conduits for the healing of others. What you may regard as your “bad parts” are only bad when you start hiding them. Other than that, they are perfectly serviceable in the kingdom of God. I love people with edges and personalities who don’t try to pretend. Aren’t we all naked before God anyway? We can’t fool the Holy One, only ourselves.
A few years ago, two movies appeared about Mr. Rogers, who impacted countless children and adults in the 1970’s and 80’s with his show, ”Mr. Roger’s neighborhood.” He was a typical wounded healer, a person made sensitive by his childhood loneliness. As a boy in Latrobe, PA he was shy, introverted, and overweight; frequently homebound after suffering bouts of asthma; bullied for his weight and called "Fat Freddy". According to Morgan Neville, director of the 2018 documentary “Won’t you be my neighbor?” Rogers had a "lonely childhood ... and would create his own worlds in his childhood bedroom with a ventriloquist dummy.” This is the same man who was able to reach children and many adults, opening their view of the world and helping them to feel loved in a magical way.
What it all comes down to is integrity. What does integrity mean? Not that you are perfect, a spiritual superman or superwoman. It means that you have been able to integrate those parts of yourself which are hurting or are in some ways less appealing to you or others. Are we able to integrate, understand and befriend our own flaws and in that way, bless them to become part of the visible you? It’s all wounded healer material because you can only heal others if your own wounds and secrets have been identified and treated and blessed, if you have made peace with them. But then, “My Lord and my God,” as Thomas said. Then, the sky is the limit to what you can do, what God is enabling and calling you to do. You have been enhumbled! You have been set free. My Lord and my God! Amen.
